Reflection
Over the last year, I'd built myself up to being really quite productive. Each morning I was waking up at about 6am and working on my projects (maths, programming, creative research, blogging, drawing, etc) before I went to work. Most Sundays would also be spent on these activities.
A fortnight ago, I wasn't feeling too well so I stopped. This morning is the first morning since then that I actually wanted to get out of bed and do something. Stopping my routine was helpful in that it gave me an idea of what was going on outside of it; a crisis. It also allowed me to see how busy I'd actually managed to be as I often give myself a hard time, I'm always trying to improve my productivity.
Currently, my life consists of living in a small, damp, dingey house, and going to work. I haven't seen my mum or my friends for an unbearable amount of time, I'm sure this is the same for you reading this. I'm not here to complain about that though, just to celebrate the routine I've built up. About a week into my crisis, I realised how important my routine had become to me, how much I wanted it back.
Realising you want something and actually getting it are two different things though, my motivation was still vacant so I used the tool that always snaps me out of a downer, the comic strip. I prefer to draw my comics in pen and ink, and then scan them in, but I really don't have enough space for that at the moment. I've tried using procreate too but it feels like too much tool for the job. Finally, I've settled on using GoodNotes. Whenever my emotions become overwhelming, I draw them, it really helps me get perspective.
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